man I’m glad I don’t ever plan on getting married because I’d be the type of person who’d probably want to propose and I’d just be all “hey let’s get hitched. Like, tomorrow or something. idk, I’ll wear my nice jeans, let’s go to the courthouse and do this.”
Because planning Kurt Hummel’s proposal is hard enough, okay. I keep alternating between thinking he’d want to keep it simple and thinking no wait this is Kurt are you kidding there are probably fireworks and a live orchestra and a trained monkey at this proposal.
note: If you like this fic and would like to see it continued/expanded for the Blaine Big Bang, please like or reblog it before Monday, April 8th. If you don’t like it, maybe you’ll like this pirate!Blaine fic instead. Whichever one has more notes on Monday will be the one I pick for the BBB. Enjoy!
It’s cold outside.
Kurt wasn’t cold. Kurt was never cold, or rather, as he explained to Blaine once, his species experienced cold differently that humans did, and so it never seemed like he was cold. Blaine, meanwhile, was wearing two different thermal shirts and an oversized hoodie, and still felt like he was freezing to death.
He shivers. “Any sign of them yet?”
Kurt doesn’t look away from the sky. “Not yet.” He smiles, grabbing Blaine’s hand into his own. “I can’t believe after all this time, I finally get to go home.”
Blaine felt slightly nauseous, but didn’t want to let go of Kurt’s hand to go vomit in the middle of a cornfield in Kentucky, so he didn’t. He was happy for Kurt and his chance to finally, finally return home, but it also sent a spike of dread into his stomach. For Kurt going home meant Blaine had to leave his. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
“Almost three years,” Kurt smiles, still staring at the stars. “I get to see my Dad again. And my friends,” he swung his hand with Blaine’s. “And I get to bring you with me. Best of both worlds.”
Blaine forces a small smile on his face. “And the baby.” He says quietly, placing his other hand on his stomach. He’s not very far along (three months), by human standards, but apparently human standards and alien standards were two entirely different things.
“Don’t worry about that,” Kurt says reassuringly. “The doctors back home will know what to do.”
“Kurt, we potentially made a new species, which shouldn’t even be possible for a number of reasons. I think I’m allowed to worry.”
Kurt finally turns away from the stars, and looks down at his lover kindly. “You’re nervous.”
He blushes slightly. “I just never envisioned meeting my partner’s family would involve spaceships.”
Kurt leans over and kisses his forehead. “They’ll love you, I promise. How could they not? I—wait.”
Blaine blinks. “Kurt? Kurt, what—”
“That was the signal. Grab a hold of me,” Kurt whispers, wrapping both arms around Blaine protectively. Blaine holds his breath and buries himself in Kurt’s arms; he is not a religious man, not by a long shot, but a part of him hopes to pray to whatever deity might be out there that he and Kurt and the baby make it through this alive and safe and happy.
There’s a bolt of light, no more inconsequential than a lightning, and then they aren’t on Earth any more.Read more
note: If you like this fic and would like to see it continued/expanded for the Blaine Big Bang, please like or reblog it before Monday, April 8th. If you don’t like it, maybe you’ll like this alien!Kurt fic instead. Whichever one has more notes on Monday will be the one I pick for the BBB. Enjoy!
Once, there was a small island kingdom, wealthy but unimposing, ruled by a just King and a fair Queen. The King and Queen had two sons, and as their youngest son Blaine grew older, his parents knew he would never be happy in their kingdom. So they did as any parents who loved their child would: they purchased for their youngest son a ship (the S. S. Dalton) and hired a lively crew (a group of rowdy boys known as the Warblers), and then they set him free.
When the money his parents sent him ran out, the Prince, as most young men with a ship and crew do, turned to piracy, and sailed the seven seas with only the wind at his back. The Prince was happy for a time, aboard his ship and among his crew, but there was something missing, and he did not know what it was.
After about a year of fearsome piracy, the crew of the S.S. Dalton found themselves a stowaway: a boy, barely older than the Prince, who wore Death’s emblem on his black cloaks and had a dark magic singing beneath his skin. The Warblers did not want him on board. They thought he was bad luck: an agent of Death like Kurt would bring nothing but harm and misfortune to them. But the Prince was unbreakably kind, and he welcomed the stowaway to the S.S. Dalton with open arms.
The stowaway, unused to such kindness and enamored by the Prince’s charms, stayed. He and the Prince grew close to one another, entertaining one another with magic and song, and it was not long before they fell unfortunately in love with one another.
But the stowaway could not remain on the ship forever, and so when he marked his intentions to leave the S.S. Dalton, the Prince went with him, happy to follow his love to the ends of the earth itself.
This is not where their story ends.Read more
Bring him peace
Bring him joy
He is young
He is only a boy
Okay, to steal a line from Kurt Hummel, truth time.
If people wrote more about this Kurt in fanfic, I’d be a lot happier. I have a hard time reconciling the Kurt I see presented to me in canon with the one that’s presented in fanon.
This Kurt is awkward in his own body (as someone with the growth spurts he’s had should be). This Kurt acts childish and silly at random moments. This Kurt dances even though he know he’s not great at anything that isn’t choreographed ahead of time. This Kurt isn’t a graceful swan of maturity and swank. This Kurt has flaws and has the potential to be incredibly frustrating. Where’s this Kurt in stories?
There are some universes where Kurt never meets Blaine on the staircase at Dalton.
Some of those universes, he doesn’t survive. Others, he’s a shadow of himself, shelled and hollowed and numb to feelings. But not all of them end unhappily, because a person’s happiness should never depend on just one other person.
In some of those universes, Kurt ends up with Adam, because a Kurt who isn’t heartbroken falls in love with Adam quickly and effortlessly, like one falls asleep. In other universes, Kurt ends up loving Chase Madison, his coworker at Vogue that he never really looked at twice.
There’s also Michael, who in one universe brings him coffee every day and studies art and writes Kurt silly love poems that don’t rhyme on the back of Starbucks coffee cups.
Then there’s Charles, the mortician that buries Kurt’s father, whose job it is to make the dead look beautiful, which fascinates Kurt to no end because Kurt in every universe is always surrounded by death.
In one universe, he stays in Lima and ends up marrying Mike Chang. In another, a kinder, softer Karofsky, one who learned earlier how to love himself.
In one universe, though, he never marries, and grows old alone until they put him in a nursing home, where he has a roommate with curly hair and golden eyes.
“Oh, there you are,” he tells Kurt fondly, with wrinkles around his eyes. ”I’ve been looking for you for forever.”
The fact that Blaine was so excited to find a way to cut 15 seconds off his daily routine.
I suddenly imagine that he’s one of those who has his schedules planned out, labeled and timed for every day of the week. Obviously, down to the second. Time management.
He probably likes to do the same for vacations. In the future, whenever he and Kurt are planning trips, he has spreadsheets color-coded and activities timed to the last second for every day they are away. And Kurt is just like “Please, can we just have one day where nothing is scheduled??”
And Blaine is just
Hahaha, I feel like this is ridiculously accurate.
Summary: Kurt and Blaine love each other very much. That part has never changed, but somewhere along the way they forgot what made them so close in the first place: that they used to tell each other everything, even the things that hurt, and they were always honest with each other. Somehow, they’ve lost that, but a brutal conversation puts them back at the beginning, and lets them start anew. [Kurt/Blaine, one-shot, where they get back together again, but it’s not easy]
Spoiler Warning: Spoilers for 4.18 that I think were actually jossed, but considering those spoilers were what inspired this fic I’m going to keep that warning up just in case. This fic tentatively takes place in what should be 4.19, timeline-wise.
Kink Warning: rimming and blowjobs and adorable baby kinksters, talk of sexual preferences and bottom!Blaine
Other Warnings: I am Ryan Murphy in that I promise this fic has a happy ending, but it takes a while to get there. Kurt and Blaine are screaming at one another through a good portion of this fic, so if you absolutely cannot handle Kurt and Blaine yelling at one another and/or arguing, this is not the fic for you. I made my betas very unhappy with me at certain points because Kurt and Blaine are brutal, when they fight they go straight for the jugular, okay, but I promise this ends with sunshine and rainbows and smut, alright, it just takes a while to get there, they’ve got issues.
Also, Kurt and Adam break up in this, so.
Word Count: 7195
Many Thanks: to my two betas, the magical and mystical Multicorn and the always fabulous Misqueue, without whom this fic would be an absolute disaster, Adam would be unrecognizable, Kurt would be even harsher and a lot of stuff wouldn’t even make sense. A lot of this is as much their baby as it is mine, and I could not have done it without them.
Kurt is having dinner with Adam when Finn calls.
“Sorry,” he laughs to his new boyfriend, standing up next to their table in the quaint Italian restaurant. “It’s my brother. I normally wouldn’t do this, but Finn doesn’t usually call and it might be about my dad—“
Adam nods understandingly, shooing Kurt away with a breadstick. “Take your time.”
But Finn is Finn, no matter how grown up he likes to pretend to be, and so when Kurt answers the phone with a shaky “Hello?” Finn’s response is to go:Read more
Sometimes I have kadam feels whoops.
Rachel Berry owns a sparkly pink dildo. Huh.
Underneath Kurt Hummel’s bed, buried under three different shoe-boxes there’s a scrapbook filled with song lyrics and magazine clippings and poetry, and she knows without being told that the scrapbook is about Blaine. If her eyes get wet, she blames the drug-filled atmosphere of Bushwick.
In the tallest drawer in Rachel’s bedroom, where Santana’s pretty sure Rachel can’t even reach without the use of a step-ladder, Santana finds an engagement ring. She’s pretty sure it’s the one Finn gave her.
Kurt owns like, five skirts.
Actually, that one’s pretty cute. Santana might have to borrow that one…
The thing that actually makes Santana tear up a little is the little altar she finds tucked away in Rachel’s closet—it’s the New Directions, bright and happy and winning, from each of their performances, out of sight and out of mind, but not, perhaps, as far away as Rachel likes to pretend they are.
In Kurt’s closet, Santana finds two rings. One is shaped like a bow-tie and made out of gum-wrappers and seems a little worn.
The other one is very, very real—an man’s engagement ring for a hobbit-sized finger—and very, very dusty, and looks like it hasn’t been touched since October.
She dusts it off for him. The blonde Dr. Who is nice and everything, but she’s smart enough to know it won’t last until Spring, and, well, Blanderson deserves a non-dusty ring, okay?